Funny Signs

Makes you think. I found these here via StumbleUpon. I did not come up with these. I'm not that talented.


1.) If you set yourself on fire somehow, DO NOT RUN!

 

2.)if you find an arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder.

 

3.) If you are sprayed with an unknown, possibly poisonous substance, do not get help. Instead, stand and ponder about it.

                                                                  

4.) If a building falls on you, use a flashlight to lift the debris right off you!

 

5.) To prevent diseases, wash with 1 armless hand under a facet with no sink.

6.)Humans, dead fish, and the biohazard sign are at risk of being sucked into a time vortex.

7.) If a door is closed, karate chop it open.

8.) Try to absorb as much radiation as you can with your groin. The current record is 5 minutes 12 seconds.

9.) If you have deformed hands, close the window. No one wants to see that.

10.) If you hear horrible music, run like hell or cower.

11.) Radioactive materials come in a wide variety of sizes to suit your need: individual, family size, neighborhood can, and supersize.

12.) Your telephone may be a physician in disguise. Look for a phone with no numbers on it.

13.) Your closet door leads to Hell. Do not open it!

14.) A one inch thick piece of plywood is sufficient protection against radiation.