“He was a major part of your life; of course you’ll miss him; it’s perfectly normal. It’s like getting a tooth pulled out; after the dentist pulls it, you’re relieved. But how many times do you run your tongue over the spot where it once was ? Probably a hundred times a day.just because it was hurting you, doesn’t mean you don’t notice it. It leaves a gap, and sometimes you see yourself missing it terribly. It’s going to take a while, but it always takes some time. Should you have kept the tooth? No, because it was causing you pain. Pulling the tooth was the right decision, but it’s still going to hurt.”
Someday, I will have a life.
It will be fulfilling and complicated and hilarious and tiring and real. And fun. There will be work and alcohol and sex and public transportation and way more coffee than is healthy. There will be different cities within each year, and art, and better friends than I have now. There will be responsibility and sleep and maybe even, someday, children. And a crush like the one I have on you won't matter at all.
But today I am 17 and unusually lonely for my age and you matter much more than you should.
Here's more, found at the main page to the second link above.
"I just discovered that you're no longer the first name that pops up in my Facebook search when I type the letter "d.""
"I'm sorry I got attached when I wasn't supposed to."
"I know you're a people person. You can't help it. But sometimes, you come off as a bit of a flirt. And it breaks my heart. Because I think I'm special, but then I realize, you're just being you, and you see me the same way you do every other girl in the world."
"And then there's the few of us that know what it's like to love someone with a burning passion that we know will leave us burnt out in the end. We feel it get more intense and swear we'll stop, after one more kiss, one more text, one more time. We swear it'll get better, and if it doesn't we'll leave for sure.
"I am happy and I can be happy and I have a right to be happy. There are days where my memories linger on moments that were uniquely ours and the jokes we shared and the letters which still remain in the lower right drawer of my desk but there they will stay. You are there. I am here and I am determined to be happy and not wondering if I deserve it. I love you, I think a part of me always will. But I'm letting it all go. I have to and more than anything I want to because before there was ever an us, there was just me and that was always more than enough."
Here's more, found at the main page to the second link above.
"I just discovered that you're no longer the first name that pops up in my Facebook search when I type the letter "d.""
"I'm sorry I got attached when I wasn't supposed to."
"I know you're a people person. You can't help it. But sometimes, you come off as a bit of a flirt. And it breaks my heart. Because I think I'm special, but then I realize, you're just being you, and you see me the same way you do every other girl in the world."
"And then there's the few of us that know what it's like to love someone with a burning passion that we know will leave us burnt out in the end. We feel it get more intense and swear we'll stop, after one more kiss, one more text, one more time. We swear it'll get better, and if it doesn't we'll leave for sure.
But we know we won't. Somewhere inside of us, that little voice of reason and honesty whispers, "Even if you had a thousand reasons to leave, you would look for just one to stay." That voice is right. Because, the way I see it, when you truly, really, without a doubt are one hundred percent commited and in love with another person, nothing and I repeat, nothing can stop you from waiting day after day after restless day for that person. But when that person makes it crystal clear that they don't feel the same way, either through actions despite their words, or words despite their contradicting actions, something in us shatters. It hurts more than anything because those incredibly strong feelings are so hard to come by. But don't let it break your heart, don't let it tear you down. Don't start speeding through new people, new relationships, and new experiences to try to forget the pain. It won't take away the pain. It'll make it even worse. Because everytime you close your eyes and feel someone else's lips, you'll open them only to realize they don't belong to the person whom your heart belongs to."
"I keep wanting to write our story over and over and over again with different tonal inflections and metaphors and maybe some alexandrines wrapped around the whole affair so each time it gets more romantic and clouded and maybe it'll end up differently. Maybe instead of planes we could exist in a world with submarines in the sky. Maybe black could be white, maybe everything could be topsy turvy, maybe we'd fall in love.
"I keep wanting to write our story over and over and over again with different tonal inflections and metaphors and maybe some alexandrines wrapped around the whole affair so each time it gets more romantic and clouded and maybe it'll end up differently. Maybe instead of planes we could exist in a world with submarines in the sky. Maybe black could be white, maybe everything could be topsy turvy, maybe we'd fall in love.
But the truth is that I'm just a girl struggling to get over a boy who, at the end of the day, has no feelings for me. And no matter how I write it, things will never change."
"Every story has an ending. Our ending wasn't a happy one. And that's ok. Now I'm looking for new and better stories.
But sometimes my mind drifts back to our story. The story that I have shelved and all but forgotten. Sometimes I wish that I could pick it up, wipe the dust off, happily turn through the worn pages, and relive our story again. And even though I know what's going to happen, and even though I know that it's not going to have a happy ending, I want to revisit our story, like an old, familiar friend, just to re-read the chapters that made me smile."
"You've been hiding from me for weeks, even months! What did I do to you personally that made you propel from me?
I've been trying to forget about you, and for some sick reason, I thought we had a chance together.
I'm lying to myself to think that I can find someone better than you. But truth is, I really cannot say anything bad about you.
Except your eyes because you couldn't see that I was in love with you."
I guess that's why I fell for you.
The you turned around and treated me like I was nothing.
I guess that's why I'm heartbroken."
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